Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Having babies, real and otherwise

Last night I had a weird dream. I dreamt I was pregnant. Before you read any further, I am NOT pregnant in real life. Throughout my life I have had recurrent dream themes.

Dream themes in my life if anyone cares

1. Shapes - these dreams were mostly as a child and the gi-normous shapes moved like meteorites by my face and often nearly killed me

2. France - I lived in France for a year and am a French major. I will speak French in my dreams and remember words I thought I had long since forgotten.

3. Natural disasters- I will spare you the horrifying details

4. Spontaneously losing my teeth - for no apparent reason, my teeth literally fall out of my head. Not a good dream since I have a thing about dentists!

5. Giving birth, being pregnant - I have had many dream babies.

But what made last night's dream especially interesting was how vivid it was and the timing. I share this with you because it is still so real in my mind. I need to share.

In my dream, I was asleep. I awaken in my dream (does this make sense??) next to my husband much like I do every morning. But in my dream, I am pregnant and our still unborn child is gently kicking me from inside the womb. I nudge the Hubs out of his sleep and put his hand on my roundish belly so he can feel our little person kicking me. Who is this little person? In my dream, in my roundish belly is a girl. And somehow, since it's a dream, I can see her, almost like there's a transparent window. Who does she look like? She looks like my orange-haired, freckle face OS. I love her. I awaken this time in real life and I have to pause for a moment to take in the depth of that dream. I awaken the Hubs who detaches himself from his C-PAP machine and he chuckles when I tell him about our little dream baby.

Why did I dream this? I have at least two theories.

1. My sister is soon to give birth. After having two simply delicious sons, Denise and her Hubs will welcome a daughter. With each passing day, I know that a little girl will join our family and PINK shall rule the land. I currently call my yet to be born niece "Miss Thang" but soon, she will have a new name. Maybe that's the reason for this dream. I'm going to be an aunt again SOON.

2. Or maybe it's this other reason. Last night I became a Teen Community Bible Study Leader. As of yesterday, I will lead (I'm pictured here with my co-leader) and disciple nearly dozen sixth and seventh grade girls!!! Girls with sparkles and pretty colors. Girls with beautiful hair the shades and hues we adult women pay top dollar to replicate. These girls are just beginning the complicated journey into womanhood. They are girls trying to flesh out their faith in Jesus and make it something authentic not just a thing their parents made them believe. And if they're like most females, they are probably full of drama, potential and personality plus some genuine problems and struggles.

I have never nor I will ever give birth to a daughter in my real life. At times I have wondered why the Lord never allowed that to happen. I don't question His will and I am perfectly, absolutely content to be the mama of three fantastic OS. I've never had to share the "joys" of menstruation and for that I give eternal thanks. Being the mama of sons has many benefits!

But I am beginning a new journey which will include girls that I will surely grow to love and cherish. I have included pictures of me here when I was in sixth and seventh grade. Maybe parts of that dream are actually becoming a reality?

Thinking pink, I am...

2 comments:

Amanda said...

Dreams are weird, aren't they? But, I LOVE CBS! This is my 5th year now - and my second year teaching toddlers. You will be great! I wish my 6th and 7th grade girls could be in your class!

Holliday Family said...

BTW, ask Denise to update her blog - she hasn't been on there for months! Hope all goes well over the next few days and weeks for her x