And it makes me wonder...

It's true, mothering has allowed me 
to blossom as a woman.

I hesitated for a moment when my orange hair, freckle face OS asked me a question during dinner last night.


"Is it ever boring just staying home all day and being a mom?"


No sooner had the words parted from those teenage ruby lips when he profusely apologized for his frankness. Truly Ike has said nastier things to me without a hint of remorse (and been punished for it, thank you very much!) but it was obvious he didn't want to hurt my feelings. 


I think it's an honest question. But what is the correct answer? Here's what I said.


"Sometimes it is boring but that's usually because I'm not doing the things I need to be doing."


It was seven and a half years before traded in my ambitious career goals and embraced the job that had been waiting for me - full-time motherhood.

The day I learned that we were going to be parents! 
Notice the EPT (Early Pregnancy Test) box 
the Hubs is holding! 

So resolute was I to stay in the business world, that upon learning that I was pregnant with my oldest OS, I ordered a TWO YEAR subscription to Working Mother magazine. I remember simultaneously nursing Nate and attempting to have a contract negotiation on the phone only ten days after his birth. But no one was going to change my opinion...not my husband, not my mom, not even my baby.


It took two more children before I figured out that the Lord had divinely appointed me to be a stay-at-home parent. I can be a bit stubborn but I was relentlessly targeted. The voice in my heart told me repeatedly that I was "perfect for the job" even if I couldn't see my qualifications. My Heavenly Father was changing me from the inside out...

Three dudes in suits

I sincerely wrestled about what to do with my life. It wasn't an easy decision as I recall sitting on our eggplant colored couch with the Hubs in the winter of 1998. Bless that man as he listened and encouraged me. I questioned, what if full-time motherhood was boring? What if I hated staying home with the guys? What if I was lonely? What if my brain turned to mush? The Hubs reassured me that it was going to be ok. And he was right. 

Now 13 years later, my youngest OS was lovingly challenging me to take stock at how it's been going for me...this whole stay-at-home mom gig.

When this kid gives this mom flowers "just because"
you have to feel good about yourself! ;)

Although my boys are older, my role as their mom is still important. To have a 21 year old son who while home from West Point brings me a bouquet of flowers "just because" is evidence that I made the right decision. To be appreciated for a pantry filled with food, much of it I prepared, affirms my position in the household. When the world laments for me because I'm a mom of three sons, two of them teenage boys, I scoff at their pettiness for I am among the most blessed. 

Three legos and a football champ!

Yes, my sweet orange hair, freckle face OS, sometimes being a mother has lackluster moments but that happens with any job as you will one day discover. Jesus gave me this exalted opportunity to raise three men of honor and faith and I will forever give him praise. 

Oh and one more thing, I hope I haven't offended anyone,
this is my personal story of transformation
and I realize other people have different mothering journeys. 

PS. I'd love to hear from you. What interesting questions have your children have posed and how you have answered them? 

Killing dust bunnies and other various enemies, part one

I now know where my oldest OS got his military ambition. Some of it came from his grandpa who is retired Air Force. The Hubs applied to the Air Force Academy (declined) and was a runner-up in at the Naval Academy, so let's say Nate's daddy passed on some military inclinations too. But I know where most of it came from. Friends, Nathan got his warrior mentality from me.

How can I say this with such bravado? I know this because last week I cleaned Aaron's and Isaac's rooms. They are 15 and almost 13. Cleaning their rooms requires a Soldier's strength.

Anyone with teenage boys knows what I'm talking about. I blithely walked into Aaron's room the other day, not looking for trouble and I was appalled to find it an utter mess. I can't even remember what I was looking for. But I do know this, I wasn't looking for the huge project which befell me AND the Hubs and even Ike. For when I saw the room in shambles, it was then and there, I purposed to do something about it.

Thankfully I did not find any food. No moldy sandwiches or half-eaten candy nor did I uncover anything really disgusting or smelly. One time I found my long-lost blue bra under a bed but that was a while ago!

But there was dust, disorder and decorating disasters everywhere. I was thick in the battlefield armed only with a vacuum, a dust towel and a computer which played soothing music to distract me. Oh, how I wanted to give up but as any good Soldier will tell you, you must destroy your opponent. And that I did and then some.

In my subsequent posts, I will show you the transformation. Aaron's room was defeated and I remain vainglorious (in a good way). Wait till you see how his room came alive!

Pajama Pants are a Pain in the Neck and the Butt!

After gobbling up the chicken manicotti, I whipped out the sewing machine for my last project, not knowing this one was going to be a real doozy.

I had begun Aaron's Thomas the Tank Engine pj pants on Saturday and felt fairly certain they were nearly finished. That feeling quickly dashed as Aaron tried the pants on for what I presumed would be the last fitting and announced these words which I will edit for my more puritan readers.

Aaron declared, "Mama, these pants are riding up my b_ _ _ s!" When I asked him to turn around, it was obvious that the pants were not only riding up his "area" but up his butt as well...basically like an Atomic Super Wedgie. I couldn't help but chuckle. Honestly, they looked incredibly uncomfortable. They were hugging his behind and the seams of the material seemed to disappear into the "Great Unknown." Ew. 

So what was I going to do? My neck/back/shoulders were in agony, I had been sewing for hours, it was past dinnertime and they had to be done by 7AM the next morning? GA! My first inclination was to tell Aaron to just deal and suck it up. Couldn't he wear them to school for seven hours and leave well enough alone? I suggested he just pull the pants down a little bit, that would do the trick. Problem solved, case closed. Personally, that would be the simplest solution as far as I was concerned.

Not so easy. Aaron reluctantly pulled his Thomas the Tank Engine pants lower but that was almost worse. I burst out loud. Now he looked slightly obscene and there is nothing worse or grosser than seeing a 14  year old boy in Thomas the Tank Engine pajama pants looking really inappropriate!

Aaron told me that he wasn't going to wear the pants in their current situation. Great. I began to rip out the crotch with my trusty seam ripper and then I had him try the pj pants on again (with boxers!) because I thought if I simply relaxed the seam, it would be fine.

I was wrong. I don't know about you but these are the moments where my self-worth is totally challenged. I go from feeling like the best mommy in the world to being the dumbest, stupidest, most worthless excuse for a mother ever. I was hurting and feeling more desperate by the second. Am I the only one who can be so cruel to herself?  

That's when I called in the big guns. My husband. Mind you, Mark hasn't sewn a thing in his life but I needed a fresh perspective and had run out of options. We surveyed the pajama pants like we were looking at a map searching for a great treasure. Like a surgeon looking inside a body cavity. The crotch seams were completely gone and it looked hopeless. Then we got an idea, something preposterous and probably impossible...

Hey, how about creating a waistband?

Why was this so outrageous?

1. I have never created a waistband. 

2. Mark can barely sew a button and has therefore never created a waistband. 

3. I was beyond tired.

4. Did I mention I was really hurting???

I emerged from a fetal position and I'm not exaggerating, there we were Sunday, about 10:30PM, commiserating over how to make our first waistband ever either individually or as a couple for a pair of Thomas the Tank Engine pajama pants for our 14 year old son. Y'all, I have no idea how we did it but glory to God, by some miracle, without instructions, we saved the pants, the junk in the trunk and the family jewels! How do you like that! By 11:30 that night, after nearly nine hours of sewing, this project was almost complete. 

I was telling my friend this story and she reminded me of a perfect Scripture verse...

James 1:3-5

because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. 

These verses fit as well as my boy's pj's!

Please take several moments to admire the waistband. Behold the craftmanship.  Please, I beg you, behold the craftmanship!

I don't think I had a stitch left in me but I loved the strong hugs from my boy. His dignity was restored and he could go to Pajama Day with his head held high. Ok, maybe not, just wait until you see his outfit...check back tomorrow for that blog post and be prepared. May I suggest not reading Friday's post on a full stomach? You'll see...

A Father's Day Gift Every Dad Wants

The tear fest has been re-activated as we are inching closer to the day of sending our boy off to West Point. I think the only one excited about Nate leaving is Aaron because he will be the head honcho (or so he thinks) around the house. He will be the oldest (theoretically) and that's important for a guy stuck in the middle.

Whereas Aaron seems to be just fine, Mark and I were a mess on Father's Day. Although the guys and I gave Mark some pretty sweet gifts: Dunder Miflin Paper Company t-shirt, frisbee golf discs along with handy-dandy holder and a very clever book (click here), it is the written words of our sons that were the most heartfelt and memorable. 

If only every father received such tender sentiments. What a world we would have if every father deserved such merit.

 

Nathan has quite a knack of making cards for others. They are usually hilarious, the guy could get a job at Hallmark, no problem which would be a lot easier than West Point, but I digress.

This Father's Day, Mark received a different style card which included a picture of Mark and baby Nate. 

In the photo, Nate is perched high on his daddy's backpack. Now this same precious child is a young man walking onto a new life and places, proud and muscular, confident and ready. Someone wrote that "tears are pride overflowed." Invest in Kleenex, folks.